Reader Response: Help for the Truly P*ssed

In my last post, I stated the obvious, in that I am not that good with the Kleenex and crumpets, that I am not really that swift as a counselor. Yes, I can give you common-sense thoughts, but that doesn’t mean that I have a shingle hanging outside my door. With that caveat, I want to address a recent comment that was made on one of my Ugly posts. I will try and address this husband’s issues, and (fingers crossed) hope that I help him and others who are in his situation. (Using my s.o.p., I address paragraphs as they come.)

This husband wrote:

Our problem starts with number one. What am I supposed to do when God (I should say church) IS the problem?

Answered in my post The Church and Your Marriage: What Could Go Wrong? First off, of course, God isn’t the problem. Men and women and their distortion of God’s word is the problem. In essence, my answer is three-fold. 

Waiting, Watching, Working: pt. 4

This 3W series is my attempt to respond to Chris Taylor’s (Forgiven Wife) suggestion that I give refused husbands guidance on what to do in the Interim™ period (by my definition, from the time of ‘awaking & smelling the coffee’ to D-Day). Either before or after The Shot Across The Bow™, I have suggested that these refused hubs spend time with the Bible (to clear away false beliefs) and prayer (to reconnect with the God of Truth). That last (Pray!), while good advice, is akin to giving a novice a dinghy and saying, “There’s the ocean, see you in Hawaii.”

As I said last time, I try to give more than generic advice, and maybe give some specifics. That’s what I want to do in this post. Keep in mind that none of this is Gospel. In fact, there’s very little “how-to” in the Gospels, so read what I say with a multitude of grains of salt, weigh my ideas in your mind, consult other teachers/writers who have given advice and make up your own mind about how you approach praying. But be sure to pray.

Waiting, Watching, Working: pt. 3

In this Waiting/Working series, I’m trying to present suggestions on what refused husbands can be doing to work on themselves during a waiting period. This “waiting period” may extend from the time that he realizes he is miserable in his marriage and needs to get it right, all the way up to the time said wife decides to **** or get off the pot. 

In my last post, I wrote about the need for a refused husband to be in God’s Word in order to transform his mind, cleansing his mind of all the bad teaching that has created Fog in his life. In this post, I want to address the accompanying tool of Prayer. I don’t know if you have noticed this about what I try to do with this blog, but I am big on how-to’s.